How To Win in Life (Warning: Positive Thinking Won’t Make You A Winner)

How-To-Win-In-The-Game-Of-Life

“The price of being a sheep is boredom. The price of being a wolf is loneliness. Choose one or the other with great care.” — Hugh MacLeod

You have probably heard the age-old saying, “you need to be positive” or “just stay positive. Everything will work out”, or the latest edition, “think positive thoughts to manifest your dreams.”

There are hundreds of variations of this, but the gist is always the same.

Fantasize about it long enough, imagining your success in great detail, and it will happen .

This bullshit philosophy has been around for decades, but more recently went viral with the release of the movie, The Secret.

You heard a rendition of this from your parents, teachers, coaches, and the movies, so it must be true, right?

Hell no.

It will not get you the body you want. It will not increase your income. It will not attract your soulmate, and it will not take your pain away.

The myth of achievement through positive thinking is a half-truth that leads many down a path of ignorant bliss followed by silent desperation, with most of the benefits going to self-help authors and motivational speakers.

It is success porn for the weak-minded. Anyone can do it because it takes no balls, passion, or persistence, just an imagination and a hard-on for an easy life.

Positive Thinking is for Losers (I’ll Show You How to Win)

If you want success on your terms, if you are going to reclaim your soul and fulfill your mission, you need to stare into the dark abyss of your subconscious limitations.

Conquering your fears will transform your life and surpass all the hopeful thoughts you could ever conjure. It is a gift that only you can give yourself, and it is a gift that keeps giving.

The rewards will be priceless and immeasurable, far beyond the idiotic bliss of corny Instagram posts and motivational Youtube videos.

Revolutionary Techniques That Will Supercharge Your Life

“As it is not one swallow or a fine day that makes a spring, so it is not one day or a short time that makes a man blessed and happy.” — Aristotle

Winning in the game of life is an art form, and your mind is the canvas.

Excellence is not something you are born with or the product of one extraordinary accomplishment. It is a state of striving and a set of daily habits.

The victorious are methodical about reaching deep every single day. And reaching deeper and deeper every single day.

It’s not easy to unlearn years of futile advice and plunge headfirst into a life of mastery, but I got you covered.

Here’s how to get started.

Destroy Yourself, So You Can Love Yourself

“The intuitive mind is a sacred gift, and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.”— Albert Einstein

To thy own self be true.

Your limiting beliefs are buried deep at your core. They are potent kryptonite that is sabotaging your climb to the sublime.

You must destroy your fears and illusory limitations, rising anew from the ashes.

Otherwise, this is how your mental dialogue goes:

You: “I am great.” Subconscious: “You’re full of shit.”

You: “I can do it.” Subconscious: “I don’t know about that.”

You: “Yes! I did it.” Subconscious: “Now you will fuck it all up.”

You: “This is fun.” Subconscious: “It won’t last.”

Sound familiar?

This was quite literally the story of my life.

But my subconscious is now my faithful servant, even despite my many weaknesses and shortcomings.

If I can do it, so can you.

The Endangered Species They Don’t Want You to Know About

You are the product of a dying breed.

Purpose, self-respect, and determination are on the verge of extinction.

It won’t take much effort to remember a time when you were inspired before, like a punch to your gut, the air was sucked out of your sails by more ‘realistic’ expectations.

In my unquenchable thirst for freedom, the tactics I deployed were legion, always to replace that dreaded punch in the gut with a firm inner voice that whispered “You will do this. Nothing can stop you. You will be legendary”.

After years of trial and error, I found a technology that allows anyone to do what sports psychologists have done with professional athletes for decades: hypnosis.

InnerTalk is a self-hypnosis technology that has subliminal affirmations woven into the background. It works (unlike binaural beats that sound nice but do nothing), and costs about $26 with a money-back guarantee.

How to Use InnerTalk

It’s easy.

Download the audio file to your smartphone from the InnerTalk website.

Use a good pair of headphones and lay or sit in a comfortable place. Get relaxed, then hit play and listen.

During the session, your conscious mind is absorbed by the soothing tones and echoes of the first layer of sound, while your subconscious receives empowering subliminal messages in the background.

You will enter a bit of a trance and emerge refreshed and recharged after the track is over.

My go-to self-hypnosis track is Creativity is Natural. It provides the following benefits:

  1. Regenerates brainpower (much like a good nap would).
  2. Immediate increase in sense of well-being (less stress and more concentration).
  3. Includes a forgiveness component, which will help you let go of resentments that no longer serve you.

Use this every day to grow a deep conviction about your ability to succeed. With enough dedication, you will realize that you were born to win.

Bonus: You can add extra gumption to your self-hypnosis by laying on an acupuncture matt. They go for about $20 on Amazon.

The Magic of Thinking Big (Not Positive)

“You commit yourself to such a level where there is no compromise. You give everything you have, absolutely everything. Sometimes you find even more.” — Ayrton Senna

Make your life epic.

Most people think small because they want to stay in their comfort zone (the latter being the antidote to winning in life).

Afraid of fighting the good fight, with all of its uncertainties, struggles, and potential for loss, they say, “give me proof” or “how long will it take?”

Like the Roman emperor in the movie Gladiator, they want to enter the fight with an unfair advantage and a wounded opponent.

They want honor without risk and sacrifice.

This is not the path of victory but of cowardice.

You may say, “How could I ever accomplish something epic? I’m just a normal person”.

The answer is simple. Take the first step. Then the next. And the next.

Be Big Enough to Be Little (This is Essential for Winning in Life)

“Before you learn how to win, you have to learn how to lose.” — Michael Jordan

John D. Rockefeller started his career as a bookkeeper working without pay, eventually making fifty cents a day. This ordinary accomplishment was the foundation for what became a four hundred billion-dollar empire.

He celebrated ‘job day’ for the rest of his life, often wondering what could have been if, after months of searching door-to-door for a job, the small produce brokerage of Hewitt & Tuttle had not given him a chance.

Never be ashamed of your vulnerabilities or lack of resources. Your heroes had humble beginnings and major setbacks too. They stressed and suffered just like you, but they kept going anyway.

Don’t give up, no matter what.

The Obstacle is The Way (The Fear is Your Guide)

You want everything to feel right, and then you will act?

Don’t make me laugh.

The alignment of the stars and galaxies will not make you whole.

This strategy did not work for the Aztecs, and it will not work for you.

Cortez set his fleet of ships on fire and told his men they were fucked unless they conquered Mexico — this proved to be the winning strategy.

Confidence Comes After You Face Your Fears.

You don’t have any ships to burn, so here’s another option.

When you get stuck at pivotal points, write about your fears in the following format:

  • What is my fear with regard to this step?
  • How could I prevent this event (the fear) from happening?
  • If the worst-case scenario does occur, how could I repair the situation?
Write Down Your Fears

Do this exercise for every aspect of your life that is limited by fear. 

You should focus on fears which are keeping you from living a better, more fulfilling life – the ones that sting when you think about them.

When you log your fears and track the results, you will realize that a great many of them never happen. Contrary to the doom projected by your homeostasis, most setbacks are easily remedied.

Learn How to Wait (Practice Delayed Gratification)

“The strongest of all warriors are these two — Time and Patience” — Leo Tolstoy

Contrary to the fraudulent teachings of movies and popular culture, small increments of improvement are the blueprint of legendary achievers.

Some steps will take longer than others, and you will need to be patient.

Human beings are short-sided creatures. We overestimate what we can do in a day, a month, and even a few years. We grossly underestimate what we can achieve in a decade.

Strive for the apex of your ability every day, focus on one step at a time, and come back to your fear-setting exercise regularly.

Practice Gratitude Daily, But Admit When You Feel Like Dog Shit

“All the fortune that I have made has not served to compensate me for the anxiety of that period” — John D. Rockefeller

Never talk to a depressed person about how great life is. In doing so, you make them even more despondent.

It is the same with you.

You cannot deceive your intuition with beautiful lies. It doesn’t work, and only increases your amount of inner turmoil.

How to Conquer the Peaks and Valleys of Mastery

  • Rule # 1: Stop Lying to Yourself.

Feeling shitty is perfectly normal, especially when you’re aiming for the pinnacle of your craft.

When pursuing your ambitions, your subconscious will tell you that you are stupid, confused, in danger, tired, hungry, horny, and over your head.

Recognize that everyone who ever dared to excel experienced the same thing.

Instead of retreating to your comfort zone, take one step back.

Let each emotion soak into your mind, body, and soul. Then regroup in whichever way works best for you.

Go to hot yoga, make love to your girl, hit the gym, read a book, talk to a friend, journal, eat a high-fat meal, meditate, pray.

Then go back to work, with your sharpest intellect.

  • Rule # 2: Embrace the Art of the Way and the Power

Masterpieces are composed of a blend of aggression and calculation, strength and finesse, struggle, and rest.

Learn how to flow through these gyrations with surgical precision, using whichever gear is required for the task at hand.

Always ask yourself the following question:

What is the most productive thing I could be doing right now?

Most of the time, this is the thing you are most uncomfortable or afraid of doing.

Produce results or build steam for your next burst of action (I recommend getting excellent sleep every night and reserving one day a week for complete leisure).

Do not fill your day with busy work (i.e., email, cleaning, paying bills). Performing these tasks repeatedly in order to feel productive will not move you closer to your goal.

  • Rule # 3: Make Every Morning A Miracle Morning

Practice gratitude daily, no matter the circumstance.

Upon waking, write down five things for which you are grateful. When you are going to bed, contemplate those five things again.

This is a powerful exercise that will improve your outlook, reduce stress, and set the tone for the day.

Fake Friends Can Fuck Off (Learn How to Say No)

The Father, The Son, and The Donkey

“Focus is about saying no” — Steve Jobs

There is an old fable about a father, his son, and their newly purchased donkey.

The father and son were walking back to their village, alongside their new donkey when they heard a man say, “What idiots! They have a donkey to ride but walk instead.”

The father and son thought this was a good point, so they both mounted the donkey to ride it home.

Along the way, they came across a passerby who said, “Poor donkey! Those lazy men are going to break his back.”

The father and son sympathized with this sentiment, so the son got off of the donkey and walked, while the father continued to ride.

They later passed a woman on the road who said, “What a horrible father! He rides the donkey and makes his son walk.”

Exasperated, the father and son decided to tie the donkey to a bamboo stick and carry it home.

When they finally got back to their village, everyone was laughing at them. “What fools! Did they purchase an injured donkey?”

The moral?

You must trust your own judgment, and ignore the advice of acquaintances and passers-by.

Trying to please everyone will make you look and feel like a moron.

The Power of No (It is Paramount in The Art Of Winning)

People don’t care about your success. They will say whatever suits their selfish desires at that particular moment, and they will not be there to deal with the loss of animus sustained from going against your conscience.

Say no to everything that gets in the way of your progress.

I’m talking about events, gatherings, projects, business ideas, jobs, television shows, calls, texts, and a myriad of other useless activities that will suffocate your aspirations into oblivion.

Here are a few examples:

  • You’re invited to go somewhere, but you don’t want to go
  • You’re asked for a favor that you don’t want to do
  • A salesman knocks on your door, and you don’t want their product
  • You receive an offer for a job that you don’t want.

Just say no.

They will get over it.

A bullshit job that other people are grateful for is still a bullshit job. A shitty artist that everyone likes is still shitty. A useless product that everyone buys is still useless.

You get the point.

How to Use the Not-To-Do List for Trojan Horses

The most damaging distractions are technology or impulse-based. They seem harmless but wreak havoc on your productivity.

The Not-To-Do list is a simple solution to small distractions that keep you out of ‘the zone.’

When you are focusing on your craft, block everything else out. This includes:

  • Browsing the internet
  • Social media
  • Youtube
  • Snacking
  • Texting
  • Phone calls
  • Small-talk

Flow state or ‘the zone’ is the mental state that is reached when you are totally immersed in the now, free from all distractions, working on your mission.

In the zone, your brain enters a higher frequency where you can draw from your intuition, as well as your rational mind.

This is where the magic happens.

Shame and Humiliation Will Make You Unstoppable

“I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong” — 2 Corinthians 12 

There is nothing more powerful than the ability to act without fear of judgment and embarrassment.

Get comfortable with humiliation by whatever means necessary. Tim Ferris recommends laying down in public, Ludvig Sunstrom suggests wearing tattered, dirty, stinky clothes out to bars.

Use your imagination, and systematically desensitize yourself to shame.

Make this a regular practice, and will you discover a profound truth.

Your fear is the path to the sublime.

Failure is the Training Ground of Champions

The common man prides himself on adequacy. He seldom fails but rarely achieves anything of substance because he is a slave to fears and insecurities.

The warrior seeks failure and embraces discomfort.

Thomas Edison is said to have failed thousands of times before finally developing a working prototype of the light bulb. When asked about all his failures, his response was “ I didn’t fail one thousand times. The light bulb was an invention of one thousand steps.

Follow the road of fear, resistance, and inadequacy all the way to victory.

The Simple But Uncommon Trait That Will Make You Legendary

Avoiding fake friends is crucial, but it is also time for you to stop being fake.

The following trait is so rare and underappreciated that it appears to be reserved for sages and monks.

How to Practice the Alchemy of Mudita

Most people are intoxicated with the poison of invidia. They want success and freedom but turn green with envy when others make progress. You must leave such trifles behind.

When someone has what you want, think about how great it must feel and step into that joy as if it were happening to you. This is the sacred tradition of mudita, and it will unlock a whole new world of possibilities for you.

It only works if it comes from the heart, so here is some advice. You don’t have to like the person, and you don’t have to agree with everything they do. Just put yourself in their position and feel vicarious joy for their success.

Did Bro start a business? Just stay on your grind. A co-worker bought a huge house? Your time will come. Your best friend fell madly in love? It could happen to you too.

If you do this, you will be light years ahead of the rest of society, and well on your way to achieving the extraordinary.

You Will Never Ride Off Into the Sunset

“I would rather die on my feet than live on my knees” — Emiliano Zapata

Your thoughts and feelings will be in a perpetual state of flux until the day you die, regardless of your struggles and setbacks, your lucky breaks and triumphs, and your strengths and insecurities.

Most men scratch the surface of many things but never even come close to their full potential. They dabble at work and in life, giving up at the first sign of adversity because they are afraid of failure and rejection.

They constantly distract themselves with social media, porn, Netflix, news, and any of the thousand other options for shallow entertainment.

Positive thinking comes in handy at this point because, hey, everything will work out.

You were born with an iron will and more strength than you realize.

Use it to persevere and succeed, not to endure the tragedy of wasted talent.

Mastery takes time, but there is more fun in the chase than the catch.

Take action daily, despite the fear, shame, and uncertainty.

This is the path of pain that leads to honor, glory, and love.

And that is how you win in life.

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