5 Guaranteed Ways to 10X Your Self-Esteem and Skyrocket Your Confidence

How to Be a Confident Man

So, you want to be a confident man?

We aren’t born with a manual on how to make our dreams a reality.

Undertaking the arduous task of chasing your dreams is excruciating in many respects. There are fears that reside deep in the recesses of the mind. They lurk in the shadows, tainting your subconscious and coercing you into mediocre pursuits.

It is what psychologist Carl Jung called “the shadow.” You can call it your dark psychological blind spot. 

Here is just one illustration of how the “shadow” works…

You see a gorgeous woman and inhale deeply, wondering what it would feel like to hold her hand or feel her soft, smooth cheek pressed gently against yours. But no sooner do these thoughts enter into your conscious mind than the correlating fears kick in and prevent you from taking action.

She would never…

… I don’t have anything to offer…

… She has to be dating somebody…

… I need to focus on myself right now…

… She is probably a gold digger…

… I couldn’t handle her…

When that quite voice deep inside whispers, “what if I’m not good enough?”, it is game over.

Your DNA and genetics step in and override your spirit, and it is a soul-draining experience. You have given into your subconscious and homeostasis.

The truth is that any one of these speculations could be true, or they could all be complete fabrications of your subconscious.

It doesn’t matter which one it is though. You must learn to fight back.

You must train your mind not to care about the result. Then lean forward and take constructive action every chance you get. That is the way of the confident man.

This principle applies across the board to every one of your ambitions:


Landing your dream job 

Learning an ultra-rare skill or art form 

Making it to the top of your class

Developing rewarding relationships 

Building an attractive, super-shredded physique

Cultivating elite confidence and self-worth

Every mighty achievement was executed one step at a time with many failures and pitfalls.

The engineers who finally made space travel possible failed thousands of times just like Thomas Edison did when inventing the light bulb.

Want to live a life of thrills, success, freedom, and creativity? Then learn how to not give a fuck what people think, and also how to fail like a badass, over and over again.

In his legendary book, You Can’t Hurt Me, Navy SEAL David Goggins talks about a common occurrence when chasing dreams. There is always the instance of coming up to a brick wall where there is no apparent course of action that will bring you closer to your goals.

Of scenarios like this, Goggins says, “When most people come up to a brick wall, they typically give up. But I start looking for a way to chip away at it.”

This is the attitude that is required. You chip away day by day. A little here and a little there.

It is a way of life. It never stops.

Bullshit Free Advise (How to Take Small Steps and Achieve Greatness)

Again, on the question, “how to be a confident man?”

The only way to shatter the invisible wall is to go deep within. Then take action again and again.

You have probably heard this type of advice on many occasions. They say, “search within yourself, and you will find the answers” or “to thine own self be true.”

Shakespeare was a genius, but most of us don’t have time for the esoteric bullshit. We want answers so we can put the pedal to the medal and get results.

Confident Man = Willingness to Fail and Get Back Up, Then Repeat

You must be willing to fail repeatedly without losing heart. You must be big enough to be small, and humble enough to start from zero.

And you must be willing to branch off and do your own thing.

“A blazing fire makes flame and brightness out of everything that is thrown into it.” — Marcus Aurelius

Some people are born into favorable situations. They may have better looks or more money. They may have had siblings or relatives who showed them the ropes and established connections for them.

This type of confidence, although beneficial in the short term, has an expiration date. It will prove to be Fugazzi sooner or later.

Fake confidence can spring you into action but fades away quickly. The value of authentic confidence, however, is priceless.

Fake Confident Man Example

Rich managed to make his deadlines and not fuck up at his job. When the weekend rolls around, he goes out with a couple of the homies and bumps into a girl he dated in the past. After a night on the town, she comes back to his place. He can add one more notch to his belt.

He got his work done and even got a compliment from the boss. Plus, he hooked up with a juicy booty call. Not a bad week, hu?

His short-term confidence tank is full now, but we all know this type of confidence boost is weak. It is a small dopamine rush that will quickly fade.

Real Confident Man Example

Jimmy wants to test his ability to weather the storm and learn the skills necessary to build a money-making empire.

He purchases a stack of the greatest self-improvement books and begins implementing the principles.

The more he pushes himself to the edge and voluntarily puts himself in scary or awkward situations, the more capable he feels of accomplishing incredible things.

He is beginning to perceive the immense value of small courageous actions which accumulate into massive increases in confidence and momentum.

Asking for help even when he is embarrassed

Implementing fasts to strengthen impulse control

Pushing harder even when not motivated

Gutting out those last two reps at the gym

Starting conversations with random people


Smiling and saying hi to every cutie he sees

What was once a discombobulating feeling of death, destruction, and despair after getting turned down now feels like a pinch on the arm.

As you can imagine, all of these actions can feel quite shitty at the time they are being performed. But they carry with them a seed of immense future potential.

Jimmy may not have much to brag about for the time being, but he is destined for astonishing feats if he keeps going.

“We are constantly being manipulated; manipulated by clever marketers who specialize in hijacking our brain’s reward system, manipulated by our own biases and psychological blind spots, and manipulated by short-term instincts, fears, and drives that couldn’t care less about our long-term well-being, careers, or networks of friends”.

— Karl-Mikael Syding, world-renowned hedge fund manager

Here are some unconventional methods to become an uber-confident man.

1. Learn How to Hack into Your Brain and Overcome Fear and Dread

How to Get Your Life Together and Crush It
BOOH – Breaking Out of Homeostasis

Read Breaking Out of Homeostasis by Ludvig Sunstrom.

If you want a badass life, you have to do hard shit. And you must be willing to endure and overcome negative feelings.

Fear, dread, and advancement go hand-in-hand. This book will show you how to become friends with your darkest fears.

Master the art of breaking out of homeostasis and your life will never be the same. Trust me, this is one of the most important books you will ever read.

It will show you how to overcome primal fear in a step-by-step process. It goes without saying that this skill can be used for life’s greatest pursuits, from dating beautiful women to overachieving and mastering any craft.

2. How the Magic of Thinking Big Works (Use Positive Subliminal Tech)

While it’s true that reading can play an incredible role in changing your perspective of the world, it is ultimately your subconscious that dictates what you truly believe about life.

There is a reason that Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, Tiger Woods, and Mike Tyson all used hypnosis to reach the apex of their abilities.

They knew that drilling the subconscious mind with empowering messages unlocks latent reservoirs of confidence and belief.

You can power up your subconscious with steady and continuous doses of positive affirmations directly into the deep recesses of your mind.

My go-to subliminal tracks are Creativity is Natural and Confidence OZO.

I listen to them alongside brain.fm beats, and it sounds amazing. 

3. Why Your Biohacking Game Will Make You a Better and Stronger Man

When I first began researching supplements that improve quality of life, nobody else was interested in biohacking. Now even news stations like Fox are covering it.

It’s true — most supplements are garbage. A few, however, have the ability to transform you into a smarter, healthier, and sharper person.

View my ultimate list of game-changing supplements right here.

Tools of Titans by Tim Ferris is also a must-read for cutting-edge methods of real self-improvement.

4. Hint: Losing Weight and Getting in Shape Will Make You Feel Amazing

The fitness industry has reached cringe levels of cliche, but the overall point is still valid. Getting in phenomenal shape will send your confidence soaring to astronomical levels.

You may not be able to look like a model by the end of this week, but you can certainly start on the path to looking like a lean and mean athletic machine. Once you acquire a masculine physique, men and women start looking at you differently — that is 100% guaranteed.

The best regimen for quick fat loss is the slow carb diet, followed by keto and intermittent fasting. 

Once you gain momentum, you can do a weekly one-day fast for explosive body transformation

5.You Can Heighten Your Confidence by Dressing Like a Stud Every Day

You don’t need to spend tons of money on clothes to look like a boss. You can outperform the majority of the male population by following a few practical guidelines. Here are a few tips:

1. Wear your best colors. This usually depends on your hair, eyes, and skin color. You can do some research to find your best colors, or you can test them out for yourself in front of a mirror.

2. Keep a fresh, well-trimmed haircut. A clean haircut and well-groomed facial hair can turn a 7 into a 9. Find a hair style that augments your facial features and keep it looking sharp around-the-clock.

3. Wear optimally fitted clothes. Most guys dress with radically unimpressive style. You can gain a massive advantage over the competition by wearing attire that fits properly and accentuates your best attributes. Some noteworthy lines are Young LA, BYLT Basics, Cutsclothing, and TrueClassicTees

These brands look dope and focus on a next-level tailored fit.

Why Most People Will Never Reach Their Highest Potential (Or Even Come Close)

It’s going to get harder and harder to be a confident man.

Your body is a human organism designed to seek safety first. It is oriented toward survival above everything else. 

This is why actions that move us closer to our highest potential feel unpleasant, discombobulating, and dysphoric. 

Your subconscious thoughts are 10X more impactful than anything in your conscious mind.

Almost all of the advice you will receive from conventional sources will never seep into your core because it won’t penetrate your subconscious mind.

That is, unless you make a strategic effort…

We are constantly bombarded with around-the-clock methods of subversive manipulation. Your job is to overpower these techniques with wisdom, intention, and determination.


Confidence is Hard to Acquire. That’s Why Most Men Will Never Have It

Most men will never be confident.

They are too proud to admit they don’t have any, ignorant of the fact they can acquire it with diligent work, or both.

True confidence is purchased with blood, sweat, and tears.

If you put in the work, you can acquire unfathomable confidence one small action at a time. Only then will everything become possible for your life.

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